Gosh, it’s been a long time since I’ve written. Sorry, folks. But we folklorists, you see, have to take something called an ‘annual Newspeak break’ from the newspaper—if we don’t, we risk spoiling our folklore left and right,—like by accidentally referring to swindlers as “lobbyists,” or bribe-money as “lobbying fees,” for example—which would definitely not last long as folklore, would it? Just because of how things like economics, politics, technology, and history work? Nope! If I want anyone to still be reading my small animal stories even five or ten years from now, I absolutely cannot miss my annual Newspeak cleanse. It’s an absolute must.

But now I’m back—and good thing, too. People kept telling me: “We need a new folklore letter!” and now I can see why! I just read some back issues, and—would ya look at that—I have a first folklore prize to award CVN content!

I saw someone recommended bringing the M/V Malaspina to Haines as a sort of much-needed economic defibrillator—and I thought to myself: “That is the first good idea I have heard for helping out the local economy in this newspaper!” 

So that’s it, the “First Big Fish Award” goes to the “Fool and his Gold” commentary! That the writer paid for the commentary out of pocket seemed to recommend its valuable contents even further. (To a folklorist, anyway.)

And seeing the words “Fool” and “gold” together certainly causes one to raise an eyebrow.

Chris Palmisano